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UID:507@sh4.org.uk
DTSTART;TZID=Europe/London:20240529T193000
DTEND;TZID=Europe/London:20240529T230000
DTSTAMP:20240604T174657Z
URL:https://www.sh4.org.uk/events/hash-1468-overshots-50th-birthday-hash/
SUMMARY:South Hams H4 Hash 1469 - Overshots 50th Birthday Hash - Fortescue 
 Arms
DESCRIPTION:The Words according to KNOW NUTS\nHash 1469 - EAST ALLINGTON:\n
 🥳 OVERSHOT'S 50th BIRTHDAY HASH 🥳\n\n(Ed. Make a cup of tea and sett
 le yourself in a comfy chair. Maybe go to the loo and lock up now\, too...
 )\n\nVery early\, in the cold light of Wednesday morning\, I awoke with a 
 jerk! I was thinking about Overshot\, which was quite worrying on every le
 vel. Today was to be his Birthday Hash and I suddenly had a mad notion I s
 hould be involved in the celebrations by doing The Words. Although it was 
 early morning\, my mind then drifted in my half-sleep to Rizzo... Yes\, it
  was crazy\, but I would text Rizzo - despite the hour - and volunteer to 
 do The Words tonight. Remarkably\, she was awake (and hadn’t blocked me)
 \, so she soon replied to accept the offer.\n\nI dozed\, thinking about ho
 w I could make these the most perfect Words for such a momentous occasion.
  Let’s face it\, I could start straight away and make it all up! Nobody 
 would know! Then\, a bombshell! Calamity! Blown Off’s words arrived in t
 he inbox. They were splendid\, such a dry wit (not perfect of course\, bec
 ause I didn’t get a mention) - they were a literary masterpiece (Ed. the
 y were. Amazing how an imminent deadline can focus the mind...😉). I was
  trapped: no making things up - we would have to stay to the end and liste
 n to Re-Entry R.A. No early bedtime for me.\n\nAfter a fretful day\, we ar
 rived early at East Allington. Rubbery was also early\, probably hopeful h
 e would be asked to get his tackle out like last week\, (see Blown Off’s
  words for details). Other early birds in attendance were Jelly Baby and W
 indy Puff\, who haven’t been for a while. Windy Puff was later to be an 
 unsuspecting aid to my information-gathering. It was a big turnout\, and I
  nervously played with my pencil-sharpener in my pocket until Rizzo brough
 t us to order. She told a joke about Wet Spot and some ice-cream\, which I
  couldn’t understand because I didn’t hear it properly. Wet Spot also 
 didn’t hear it but he did understand. I am still none the wiser. (Ed. So
 rry: I missed it\, too - it must have been a special vegan one...🧐) A v
 isitor\, Goldfish - son of Gaffer and Yeuck - was introduced. When it was 
 suggested Gaffer would look after him\, it was revealed he was here as Gaf
 fer’s carer for the evening. More about Goldfish later.\n\nRizzo announc
 ed I had volunteered to do The Words with some delight. I shared the prese
 nce of my pencil-sharpener with the assembled and said I had been blown aw
 ay by Blown Off’s words. Blown Off received a standing ovation from the 
 masses\, which I would say was a first for appreciation of The Words! Mayb
 e a T-Shirt\, or perhaps a gold pencil-sharpener could be awarded for 'Bes
 t Words' each year in the future (Ed. great idea 😁 Form an orderly queu
 e\, now\, people: no pushing to the front!)\, which would make Rizzo’s j
 ob that much easier as we all compete for a chance to display our literary
  talents?\n\nOver to the hares: Overshot took centre-stage\, his assistant
 s\, Sniffer and Chipolata\, being in the background. It seems Overshot and
  Sniffer are similar to Nutcracker and myself\, in that we only have one a
 rgument when laying a hash: it starts at the beginning\, and finishes a da
 y or so later. After some confused and contradictory laying\, Overshot had
  to clarify the On On route by upgrading to 5-dots-and-on for the correct 
 trail. As he explained this\, he held up five fingers and looked directly 
 at me\, for some reason. The Birthday Boy then waffled on rather pointless
 ly about which gates to open and which gates to climb\, and just managed t
 o start us off before we lost the will to live.\n\nWe were off\, down Gree
 nhill and left into the field. As the pack stretched away into the distanc
 e\, I soon teamed up with Yeuck\, who was running really well - and didn
 ’t stop running until after she announced we had done a mile. I was stru
 ggling to keep up and didn’t have the usual opportunity to share with he
 r stories of when I was a lad. Nevermind - if I can remember them\, I will
  tell her next time. Yueck\, however\, eventually settled to my pace and s
 hared with me how Goldfish got his name. It seems he spent his early time 
 as a baby in an incubator and they thought he looked like a goldfish in a 
 bowl. At the On Downs\, when Re-Entry suggested it was a bit harsh to be n
 amed after his incubator\, Gaffer revealed they used to carry him around t
 he hash for his first 6 months. (He didn’t make it clear if he was in th
 e incubator at the time or whether after the first 6 months he was left to
  crawl along behind.) Perhaps now Goldfish is Gaffer’s carer he can reap
  some revenge?\n\nAt the first stream crossing\, we all went down the righ
 t-hand side of the field\, through the reeds and mud and across the stream
 . Well\, all of us except Py and Wet Spot\, who went left in an attempt at
  keeping dry feet. Morticia and Gomez followed. We went up along the top o
 f the field and back down to find them in the same stream\, just a little 
 further down and having suffered a little poetic justice as they slipped o
 n the mud. Py got into difficulties with a big log and Flage-No-Lay came t
 o her rescue.\n\nAs we plodded along\, we lost count of how many times the
  Longs overtook us. We agreed we would ask Winnie the Poo about counting w
 hen we got back\, her being an accountant and all. But of course\, that is
  sign of a well\, designed and laid hash - probably in a great part thanks
  to Sniffer’s input and the new 5-dots-and-on system. On one of these oc
 casions\, as the Longs went by\, Rizzo and Nice Buns overtook\, going uphi
 ll and alongside a road. A crowd of supporters (two) had gathered at the w
 all along the top of the field. I asked if they were family\; Nice Buns sa
 id “No\, daughters”! (Ed. nothing like a bit of light heckling to demo
 nstrate the filial bond).\n\nRe-Entry\, (R.A.)\, said that Bit of Ruff\, R
 e-Entry\, Triple Top and Shaggy were the only ones to get to 50\, (Rizzo c
 laims she did as well). I have no idea what he was talking about...perhaps
  I should have listened a little more intently? (Ed. another tasty innovat
 ion from the hares\, in a nod to Overshot's half-century: a hilarious [...
 ] check back\, featuring not one\, not five but 50 [count them...I failed 
 to [just one more in an embarrassedly hefty catalogue of errors] marks to 
 rewind on the trail... As I say\, hilarious.) Anyway\, Bit of Ruff took to
  sprinting to try and keep the lead\, all to no avail as the new 5-dot sys
 tem caused confusion in the woods\, with Shaggy getting it wrong and leadi
 ng the Longs astray\, just to yet again trot past Yeuck and myself. I was 
 distracted by Shaggy’s legs\, which it seems had yet again been in the w
 ars. She had apparently been plastered since the weekend (Ed. I could refu
 te this as nonsense\, in querulous and affronted tones\, but there is very
  little point\, as we all know...)\, which probably explains it all. In he
 r injured state\, Shaggy proceeded to slide down through the woods on the 
 mud in a sort of bottom-skiing method\, to arrive at the foot of the slope
  with a little bow. Then\, at a later point\, she appeared out of a stream
  with Can’t Come and when I asked how that came about\, as she overtook 
 us yet again\, she had no idea but said Olive was probably to blame as she
  was also somewhere in the stream (Ed. true story...😉).\n\nOlive then h
 ad a bit of a turn! She was with Can’t Come\, who had a bit of a tell-ta
 le stain on his shorts and she had to sniff a nettle to clear her head bec
 ause she thought that Can’t Come Can Come! (Ed. there is much reference 
 to nettle-sniffing in the following 352 paragraphs...is this a known resto
 rative treatment\, of a similar order as Lady Bennett's smelling salts?) I
 t turns out it was all innocent. It came to pass that Wet Spot was annoyed
  about the ice-cream joke we didn’t hear and threw a drink at Rizzo at o
 ne of the beer stops - which missed her and landed on Can’t Come in an e
 mbarrassing little (Ed. no need to rub salt in the wound\, so to speak...!
 ) area. Fortunately\, no real harm was done and thankfully there seemed to
  be an abundance of nettles for Olive to sniff to help her regain her comp
 osure (and sting everybody’s legs). All of this had a bit of a lasting e
 ffect on Olive\, who took to opening gates whenever she came across one. (
 Once she stopped sniffing nettles and just had her legs stung like the res
 t of us\, she was okay.) I hope she entered the nettle-sniffing in the inc
 ident book?\n\nThe mention of the Circle Up reminds me about Windy Puff wh
 o hasn’t come for a while and took the opportunity to interrogate anybod
 y who couldn’t run quick enough. One such candidate was Blown Off\, who 
 was temporarily frustrated as he waited for Tyred Bunny to mount a gate. B
 lown Off was luxuriating in his prowess (Ed. assumed - but not not clear i
 f - limited to Words-writing) and said that a rule he applies to all thing
 s is that if he only does it once a year\, he feels he should really put s
 ome effort into it. At the On Downs\, Re-Entry congratulated Winnie the Po
 o on her good fortune in such matters.\n\nHaving lost Yeuck and being join
 ed by Tyred Bunny\, I commented how well TB was running. He said it was a 
 combination of his years of training in the military and having recently b
 een on exercises\, (a walking holiday somewhere). In an attempt to impress
  the nearby Harriets\, he attempted a military-style assault on the above-
 mentioned gate\, only to disappoint all in the queue behind him. Always on
 e for a quick recovery\, he embraced the interview with Windy Puff\, sayin
 g that he had realised he generally goes hard at things for about 15 secon
 ds only to run out of steam. I didn’t quite hear the rest of the convers
 ation\, which may of course put it into context.\n\nIn apparently unrelate
 d incidents\, Willie Waver went mad and Whisperer became confused! Willie 
 Waver ended up covered in flour and said somebody had thrown it over him (
 Ed. it is traditional to blame Wet Spot in such cases\, of course...photog
 raphic evidence\, though\, points to his chauffeur for the evening...). It
  was reported\, by an undisclosed source\, that he just saw a white powder
  and decided to roll in it like a fox. Soon after\, Whisperer was found in
  the road in a confused state. Because of the white substance infatuation 
 by Willie Waver\, we didn’t attempt nettle-sniffing but they both had th
 eir legs stung by nettles\, regained their senses and - we assume - made a
  full recovery.\n\nIn a brief moment of calm\, I found myself walking with
  a new un-named hasher called George from Ugborough. He was amazed I could
  identify Py\, Spotty Botty and Marty at the full distance of a field just
  by their silhouette in the fading light. George had a little dog\, I thin
 k called Kelp - who made no attempt to yelp (Ed. I hope no animals were ha
 rmed in the making of this tale?). Before I could start on a story from wh
 en I was a lad\, he had gone. Spooky or what?\n\nMeanwhile\, back at the b
 eer stop\, Sniffer and Chipolata had been doing sterling work feeding and 
 watering the stung and wounded. Apparently\, Filth had taken great offence
  at the inference made by Chipolata's insistence that her Coke should be D
 iet Coke. Re-Entry was shocked by it all\, including Chipolata's (Ed. alle
 ged) enjoyment of aspartame. Until the On Downs\, I hadn’t realised the 
 clever location of the beer stop\, which served twice for both occasions. 
 Clearly a piece of smart organisation by Sniffer as a seasoned events orga
 niser. Marty and Spotty Botty shortcutted and missed the second go at the 
 beer stop. I actually followed them over the side-gate and got my legs stu
 ng again. Traffic Jam appeared and told me to go back because I had missed
  the beer stop. I didn’t fancy another nettle sting\, so ran down the tr
 ack and appeared to find Py berating any shortcutters - which I felt was a
  bit out of order\, because she was as guilty as anybody (Ed. please scrol
 l up for half an hour or so for reference to Py's previous shortcutting mi
 sdemeanour).\n\nAlas\, the end is near\, and I arrived at the car to get c
 hanged. I was parked down-slope and behind Dimwit’s car in which Wet Spo
 t was a passenger. As I was getting changed I noticed a rivulet of liquid 
 weedling its way down the road towards me. I made a remark about it\, at w
 hich point Wet Spot apologised thinking he must have had an uncontrolled l
 eak. No\, it was Dimwit! He had a garden pump-up killer (Ed. weed? Or just
  a run-of-the-mill serial kind?) spray full of water of a questionable nat
 ure. He was hosing himself off\, giving the occasional pump\, and then Liv
 ewire arrived with a wound from rusty barbed wire\, which was attributed t
 o Who Gives a Shit’s fence management. A little unfair\, as he had allow
 ed us to run across his fields: personally\, I think a little wire-wound i
 s an acceptable price to pay for such freedom. Livewire took advantage of 
 the situation to have his leg attended to by Rizzo and score an entry in t
 he naughty book\, next to the nettle-stung noses.\n\nNutcracker has just c
 ome home and told me not to make the words too long. Bother.\n\nSo\, we we
 nt in t' pub and Re-Entry did a grand job as R.A. - and now does his notes
  on the phone so he could send them to me: thank you. We asked Winnie the 
 Poo about counting the number of times the Longs overtook us and she said\
 , 'Just use your fingers\, and if need be take your shoes and socks off an
 d use your toes'. She said it works for her as an accountant. Come to thin
 k of it\, I think she made a joke I didn’t hear but everybody else seeme
 d to enjoy... (Ed. counting on fingers featured again 😆) We sang Happy 
 Birthday to: Overshot\, Hekkel and Goldfish. Twin Buffers was given her 30
 0 T-Shirt\, to enthusiastic applause. Sniffer produced a delightful chocol
 ate cake: following the requisite risk assessment and\, due to cut-backs a
 t Devon Fire and Rescue\, she couldn’t have the full fifty candles\, so 
 Overshot just had to blow the two. (Ed. And\, in a late addition to the su
 bmitted Words\, and that the Scribe was really quite keen I insert\, a tru
 ly noteworthy occurrence: Olive and Barbarella arrived back at the pub not
  only NOT last\, but before 9pm! [The absence of the third of the three Lo
 st Causes was noted with interest...] Sorry Overhshot\, but I think this i
 s the headline item from Hash 1469.)\n\nOvershot went grey.\n\nDown Downs 
 went to:\nOvershot – Hare and Birthday\nTwin Buffers – 300 T-shirt\nSh
 aggy – swimming\, sliding\, getting lost\nWinnie the Poo – counting fi
 ngers\nGoldfish – Birthday\, and care for the elderly\nCan’t Come – 
 can come\n\nAcknowledgements:\nThanks to: Overshot\, Sniffer and Chipolata
  for a great hash\, Re-Entry for his notes\, and Shaggy in anticipation of
  her editing - I hope she doesn’t cut too much! (Ed. practically untouch
 ed 👍 - I wouldn't want to compromise anything of the wonderfully meande
 ring narrative concocted by such a willing and conscientious Scribe 😘 P
 lus\, I think it only fair that you all enjoy the whole submission\, just 
 like me... 😆). Just out of interest: the last time I did The Words was 
 Hash 1400 at East Allington\, laid by Overshot and Rubbery - spooky\, or w
 hat? x\n\nOn-On to YEALMPTON\n__________________\n\n🏃 📸 🍻 You can
  enjoy highlights from the 50-themed technical East Allington hash 1469 on
  29th May 2024\, and afterwards at The Fortescue Arms\, by checking out Ha
 sh Flash's purpose-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook Group 📸 🏃
 🍻\n\n_________________\n\nNext SH4 Hash 🐷👣:\n\nHASH 1470 - YEALMP
 TON - 5 June\, 2024\n\nCIRCLE UP:\nThe Volunteer\n15 Fore Street\nYealmpto
 n\nPL8 2JN\nWhat3Words: ///compliant.only.nuns\n\nON DOWN:\nSee above.\n\n
 Hares: Nokkers\, Lady Godiva &amp\; Barbarella\nRA: TBC\n\nHASH MENU\n\n&n
 bsp\;\n\nFor full details\, please see the Hash 1470 event page on the SH4
  Facebook Group.\n\n📝 If you're the lucky Scribe at YEALMPTON next week
 \, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunda
 y evening (9 June)\, ideally - TVM! 📝\n\nAdd your photos of the evening
 's carryings-on at Yealmpton (Weds 5 June\, 2024) to the Hash 1470 photo a
 lbum\, when it has been conjured into being.\n_________________\nHASH DIAR
 Y - Upcoming Events\n\n🌟FALLEN WOMAN'S MEMORIAL HASH\, 1st June 2024
 🌟\n\n❗➡ LATE CHANGE TO HASH MENU ⬅ ❗\n\nFor anyone who hasn't y
 et seen the messages on the Facebook group chat\, there has been a late ch
 ange to the menu being offered at The Yacht Club after Saturday's Memorial
  Hash. Unfortunately\, only the following reduced menu will now be availab
 le:\n\n* Chips - £3.00\n*Cheesy Chips - £3.70\n* Meat/Vegetarian Pasty -
  £4.50\n\n** Please order and pay on the day directly to the Yacht Club *
 *\n\nThank you for your understanding.\n\n🌟 🌟 Please remember your b
 right colours in Fallen Woman's honour 🌟 🌟\n\nAlso\, please be advis
 ed that The English Riviera Air Show is on in Paignton over this weekend\,
  so traffic in and around the area is likely to be much heavier than usual
  and parking could be a bit more challenging\, so please try and allow ple
 nty of travel (and parking) time if you can.\n\n(An extra tip from hasher 
 chat discussions today has suggested downloading the RingGo app\, or carry
 ing abundant loose change for parking machines [that don't take credit/deb
 it card payments].)\n\n👣\n\nRubbery and Pony Shafter have also created 
 a photo album on Facebook - Fallen Woman's Memorial Album - to which hashe
 rs are invited to contribute photos representing their brightest and best 
 memories of the fabulous Fallen Woman.\n\n👣\n_________________\n\n&nbsp
 \;\n\n👣\n_________________\n\nRAMBO SALCOMBE MARATHON 2024\nSaturday 21
 st September\, 2024\n\n👣\n\n🌟 🌟 🌟 Register here: https://bit.l
 y/RamboSM2024 🌟 🌟 🌟\nOR scan the QR code\, below:\n\n👣\n______
 _____________\nSH4 MercHASHdise (Sorry - I still can't think of anything m
 ore inventive...)\n\nShow your love for SH4 and wear your membership proud
 ly with a bespoke SH4 car sticker!\n\nAvailable exclusively to SH4 members
  (and\, to be fair\, anyone else who wants one...) for the bargain sum of 
 £0.50 ea.\, you can afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊\n\nS
 ee Rizzo at the next meet for yours 👣\n\n_____________________ - The Wo
 rds according to KNOW NUTS\nHash 1469 - EAST ALLINGTON:\n🥳 OVERSHOT'S 5
 0th BIRTHDAY HASH 🥳\n\n(Ed. Make a cup of tea and settle yourself in a 
 comfy chair. Maybe go to the loo and lock up now\, too...)\n\nVery early\,
  in the cold light of Wednesday morning\, I awoke with a jerk! I was think
 ing about Overshot\, which was quite worrying on every level. Today was to
  be his Birthday Hash and I suddenly had a mad notion I should be involved
  in the celebrations by doing The Words. Although it was early morning\, m
 y mind then drifted in my half-sleep to Rizzo... Yes\, it was crazy\, but 
 I would text Rizzo - despite the hour - and volunteer to do The Words toni
 ght. Remarkably\, she was awake (and hadn’t blocked me)\, so she soon re
 plied to accept the offer.\n\nI dozed\, thinking about how I could make th
 ese the most perfect Words for such a momentous occasion. Let’s face it\
 , I could start straight away and make it all up! Nobody would know! Then\
 , a bombshell! Calamity! Blown Off’s words arrived in the inbox. They we
 re splendid\, such a dry wit (not perfect of course\, because I didn’t g
 et a mention) - they were a literary masterpiece (Ed. they were. Amazing h
 ow an imminent deadline can focus the mind...😉). I was trapped: no maki
 ng things up - we would have to stay to the end and listen to Re-Entry R.A
 . No early bedtime for me.\n\nAfter a fretful day\, we arrived early at Ea
 st Allington. Rubbery was also early\, probably hopeful he would be asked 
 to get his tackle out like last week\, (see Blown Off’s words for detail
 s). Other early birds in attendance were Jelly Baby and Windy Puff\, who h
 aven’t been for a while. Windy Puff was later to be an unsuspecting aid 
 to my information-gathering. It was a big turnout\, and I nervously played
  with my pencil-sharpener in my pocket until Rizzo brought us to order. Sh
 e told a joke about Wet Spot and some ice-cream\, which I couldn’t under
 stand because I didn’t hear it properly. Wet Spot also didn’t hear it 
 but he did understand. I am still none the wiser. (Ed. Sorry: I missed it\
 , too - it must have been a special vegan one...🧐) A visitor\, Goldfish
  - son of Gaffer and Yeuck - was introduced. When it was suggested Gaffer 
 would look after him\, it was revealed he was here as Gaffer’s carer for
  the evening. More about Goldfish later.\n\nRizzo announced I had voluntee
 red to do The Words with some delight. I shared the presence of my pencil-
 sharpener with the assembled and said I had been blown away by Blown Off
 ’s words. Blown Off received a standing ovation from the masses\, which 
 I would say was a first for appreciation of The Words! Maybe a T-Shirt\, o
 r perhaps a gold pencil-sharpener could be awarded for 'Best Words' each y
 ear in the future (Ed. great idea 😁 Form an orderly queue\, now\, peopl
 e: no pushing to the front!)\, which would make Rizzo’s job that much ea
 sier as we all compete for a chance to display our literary talents?\n\nOv
 er to the hares: Overshot took centre-stage\, his assistants\, Sniffer and
  Chipolata\, being in the background. It seems Overshot and Sniffer are si
 milar to Nutcracker and myself\, in that we only have one argument when la
 ying a hash: it starts at the beginning\, and finishes a day or so later. 
 After some confused and contradictory laying\, Overshot had to clarify the
  On On route by upgrading to 5-dots-and-on for the correct trail. As he ex
 plained this\, he held up five fingers and looked directly at me\, for som
 e reason. The Birthday Boy then waffled on rather pointlessly about which 
 gates to open and which gates to climb\, and just managed to start us off 
 before we lost the will to live.\n\nWe were off\, down Greenhill and left 
 into the field. As the pack stretched away into the distance\, I soon team
 ed up with Yeuck\, who was running really well - and didn’t stop running
  until after she announced we had done a mile. I was struggling to keep up
  and didn’t have the usual opportunity to share with her stories of when
  I was a lad. Nevermind - if I can remember them\, I will tell her next ti
 me. Yueck\, however\, eventually settled to my pace and shared with me how
  Goldfish got his name. It seems he spent his early time as a baby in an i
 ncubator and they thought he looked like a goldfish in a bowl. At the On D
 owns\, when Re-Entry suggested it was a bit harsh to be named after his in
 cubator\, Gaffer revealed they used to carry him around the hash for his f
 irst 6 months. (He didn’t make it clear if he was in the incubator at th
 e time or whether after the first 6 months he was left to crawl along behi
 nd.) Perhaps now Goldfish is Gaffer’s carer he can reap some revenge?\n\
 nAt the first stream crossing\, we all went down the right-hand side of th
 e field\, through the reeds and mud and across the stream. Well\, all of u
 s except Py and Wet Spot\, who went left in an attempt at keeping dry feet
 . Morticia and Gomez followed. We went up along the top of the field and b
 ack down to find them in the same stream\, just a little further down and 
 having suffered a little poetic justice as they slipped on the mud. Py got
  into difficulties with a big log and Flage-No-Lay came to her rescue.\n\n
 As we plodded along\, we lost count of how many times the Longs overtook u
 s. We agreed we would ask Winnie the Poo about counting when we got back\,
  her being an accountant and all. But of course\, that is sign of a well\,
  designed and laid hash - probably in a great part thanks to Sniffer’s i
 nput and the new 5-dots-and-on system. On one of these occasions\, as the 
 Longs went by\, Rizzo and Nice Buns overtook\, going uphill and alongside 
 a road. A crowd of supporters (two) had gathered at the wall along the top
  of the field. I asked if they were family\; Nice Buns said “No\, daught
 ers”! (Ed. nothing like a bit of light heckling to demonstrate the filia
 l bond).\n\nRe-Entry\, (R.A.)\, said that Bit of Ruff\, Re-Entry\, Triple 
 Top and Shaggy were the only ones to get to 50\, (Rizzo claims she did as 
 well). I have no idea what he was talking about...perhaps I should have li
 stened a little more intently? (Ed. another tasty innovation from the hare
 s\, in a nod to Overshot's half-century: a hilarious [...] check back\, fe
 aturing not one\, not five but 50 [count them...I failed to [just one more
  in an embarrassedly hefty catalogue of errors] marks to rewind on the tra
 il... As I say\, hilarious.) Anyway\, Bit of Ruff took to sprinting to try
  and keep the lead\, all to no avail as the new 5-dot system caused confus
 ion in the woods\, with Shaggy getting it wrong and leading the Longs astr
 ay\, just to yet again trot past Yeuck and myself. I was distracted by Sha
 ggy’s legs\, which it seems had yet again been in the wars. She had appa
 rently been plastered since the weekend (Ed. I could refute this as nonsen
 se\, in querulous and affronted tones\, but there is very little point\, a
 s we all know...)\, which probably explains it all. In her injured state\,
  Shaggy proceeded to slide down through the woods on the mud in a sort of 
 bottom-skiing method\, to arrive at the foot of the slope with a little bo
 w. Then\, at a later point\, she appeared out of a stream with Can’t Com
 e and when I asked how that came about\, as she overtook us yet again\, sh
 e had no idea but said Olive was probably to blame as she was also somewhe
 re in the stream (Ed. true story...😉).\n\nOlive then had a bit of a tur
 n! She was with Can’t Come\, who had a bit of a tell-tale stain on his s
 horts and she had to sniff a nettle to clear her head because she thought 
 that Can’t Come Can Come! (Ed. there is much reference to nettle-sniffin
 g in the following 352 paragraphs...is this a known restorative treatment\
 , of a similar order as Lady Bennett's smelling salts?) It turns out it wa
 s all innocent. It came to pass that Wet Spot was annoyed about the ice-cr
 eam joke we didn’t hear and threw a drink at Rizzo at one of the beer st
 ops - which missed her and landed on Can’t Come in an embarrassing littl
 e (Ed. no need to rub salt in the wound\, so to speak...!) area. Fortunate
 ly\, no real harm was done and thankfully there seemed to be an abundance 
 of nettles for Olive to sniff to help her regain her composure (and sting 
 everybody’s legs). All of this had a bit of a lasting effect on Olive\, 
 who took to opening gates whenever she came across one. (Once she stopped 
 sniffing nettles and just had her legs stung like the rest of us\, she was
  okay.) I hope she entered the nettle-sniffing in the incident book?\n\nTh
 e mention of the Circle Up reminds me about Windy Puff who hasn’t come f
 or a while and took the opportunity to interrogate anybody who couldn’t 
 run quick enough. One such candidate was Blown Off\, who was temporarily f
 rustrated as he waited for Tyred Bunny to mount a gate. Blown Off was luxu
 riating in his prowess (Ed. assumed - but not not clear if - limited to Wo
 rds-writing) and said that a rule he applies to all things is that if he o
 nly does it once a year\, he feels he should really put some effort into i
 t. At the On Downs\, Re-Entry congratulated Winnie the Poo on her good for
 tune in such matters.\n\nHaving lost Yeuck and being joined by Tyred Bunny
 \, I commented how well TB was running. He said it was a combination of hi
 s years of training in the military and having recently been on exercises\
 , (a walking holiday somewhere). In an attempt to impress the nearby Harri
 ets\, he attempted a military-style assault on the above-mentioned gate\, 
 only to disappoint all in the queue behind him. Always one for a quick rec
 overy\, he embraced the interview with Windy Puff\, saying that he had rea
 lised he generally goes hard at things for about 15 seconds only to run ou
 t of steam. I didn’t quite hear the rest of the conversation\, which may
  of course put it into context.\n\nIn apparently unrelated incidents\, Wil
 lie Waver went mad and Whisperer became confused! Willie Waver ended up co
 vered in flour and said somebody had thrown it over him (Ed. it is traditi
 onal to blame Wet Spot in such cases\, of course...photographic evidence\,
  though\, points to his chauffeur for the evening...). It was reported\, b
 y an undisclosed source\, that he just saw a white powder and decided to r
 oll in it like a fox. Soon after\, Whisperer was found in the road in a co
 nfused state. Because of the white substance infatuation by Willie Waver\,
  we didn’t attempt nettle-sniffing but they both had their legs stung by
  nettles\, regained their senses and - we assume - made a full recovery.\n
 \nIn a brief moment of calm\, I found myself walking with a new un-named h
 asher called George from Ugborough. He was amazed I could identify Py\, Sp
 otty Botty and Marty at the full distance of a field just by their silhoue
 tte in the fading light. George had a little dog\, I think called Kelp - w
 ho made no attempt to yelp (Ed. I hope no animals were harmed in the makin
 g of this tale?). Before I could start on a story from when I was a lad\, 
 he had gone. Spooky or what?\n\nMeanwhile\, back at the beer stop\, Sniffe
 r and Chipolata had been doing sterling work feeding and watering the stun
 g and wounded. Apparently\, Filth had taken great offence at the inference
  made by Chipolata's insistence that her Coke should be Diet Coke. Re-Entr
 y was shocked by it all\, including Chipolata's (Ed. alleged) enjoyment of
  aspartame. Until the On Downs\, I hadn’t realised the clever location o
 f the beer stop\, which served twice for both occasions. Clearly a piece o
 f smart organisation by Sniffer as a seasoned events organiser. Marty and 
 Spotty Botty shortcutted and missed the second go at the beer stop. I actu
 ally followed them over the side-gate and got my legs stung again. Traffic
  Jam appeared and told me to go back because I had missed the beer stop. I
  didn’t fancy another nettle sting\, so ran down the track and appeared 
 to find Py berating any shortcutters - which I felt was a bit out of order
 \, because she was as guilty as anybody (Ed. please scroll up for half an 
 hour or so for reference to Py's previous shortcutting misdemeanour).\n\nA
 las\, the end is near\, and I arrived at the car to get changed. I was par
 ked down-slope and behind Dimwit’s car in which Wet Spot was a passenger
 . As I was getting changed I noticed a rivulet of liquid weedling its way 
 down the road towards me. I made a remark about it\, at which point Wet Sp
 ot apologised thinking he must have had an uncontrolled leak. No\, it was 
 Dimwit! He had a garden pump-up killer (Ed. weed? Or just a run-of-the-mil
 l serial kind?) spray full of water of a questionable nature. He was hosin
 g himself off\, giving the occasional pump\, and then Livewire arrived wit
 h a wound from rusty barbed wire\, which was attributed to Who Gives a Shi
 t’s fence management. A little unfair\, as he had allowed us to run acro
 ss his fields: personally\, I think a little wire-wound is an acceptable p
 rice to pay for such freedom. Livewire took advantage of the situation to 
 have his leg attended to by Rizzo and score an entry in the naughty book\,
  next to the nettle-stung noses.\n\nNutcracker has just come home and told
  me not to make the words too long. Bother.\n\nSo\, we went in t' pub and 
 Re-Entry did a grand job as R.A. - and now does his notes on the phone so 
 he could send them to me: thank you. We asked Winnie the Poo about countin
 g the number of times the Longs overtook us and she said\, 'Just use your 
 fingers\, and if need be take your shoes and socks off and use your toes'.
  She said it works for her as an accountant. Come to think of it\, I think
  she made a joke I didn’t hear but everybody else seemed to enjoy... (Ed
 . counting on fingers featured again 😆) We sang Happy Birthday to: Over
 shot\, Hekkel and Goldfish. Twin Buffers was given her 300 T-Shirt\, to en
 thusiastic applause. Sniffer produced a delightful chocolate cake: followi
 ng the requisite risk assessment and\, due to cut-backs at Devon Fire and 
 Rescue\, she couldn’t have the full fifty candles\, so Overshot just had
  to blow the two. (Ed. And\, in a late addition to the submitted Words\, a
 nd that the Scribe was really quite keen I insert\, a truly noteworthy occ
 urrence: Olive and Barbarella arrived back at the pub not only NOT last\, 
 but before 9pm! [The absence of the third of the three Lost Causes was not
 ed with interest...] Sorry Overhshot\, but I think this is the headline it
 em from Hash 1469.)\n\nOvershot went grey.\n\nDown Downs went to:\nOversho
 t – Hare and Birthday\nTwin Buffers – 300 T-shirt\nShaggy – swimming
 \, sliding\, getting lost\nWinnie the Poo – counting fingers\nGoldfish 
 – Birthday\, and care for the elderly\nCan’t Come – can come\n\nAckn
 owledgements:\nThanks to: Overshot\, Sniffer and Chipolata for a great has
 h\, Re-Entry for his notes\, and Shaggy in anticipation of her editing - I
  hope she doesn’t cut too much! (Ed. practically untouched 👍 - I woul
 dn't want to compromise anything of the wonderfully meandering narrative c
 oncocted by such a willing and conscientious Scribe 😘 Plus\, I think it
  only fair that you all enjoy the whole submission\, just like me... 😆)
 . Just out of interest: the last time I did The Words was Hash 1400 at Eas
 t Allington\, laid by Overshot and Rubbery - spooky\, or what? x\n\nOn-On 
 to YEALMPTON\n__________________\n\n🏃 📸 🍻 You can enjoy highlight
 s from the 50-themed technical East Allington hash 1469 on 29th May 2024\,
  and afterwards at The Fortescue Arms\, by checking out Hash Flash's purpo
 se-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook Group 📸 🏃🍻\n\n__________
 _______\n\nNext SH4 Hash 🐷👣:\n\nHASH 1470 - YEALMPTON - 5 June\, 202
 4\n\nCIRCLE UP:\nThe Volunteer\n15 Fore Street\nYealmpton\nPL8 2JN\nWhat3W
 ords: ///compliant.only.nuns\n\nON DOWN:\nSee above.\n\nHares: Nokkers\, L
 ady Godiva &amp\; Barbarella\nRA: TBC\n\nHASH MENU\n\n&nbsp\;\n\nFor full 
 details\, please see the Hash 1470 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.\n
 \n📝 If you're the lucky Scribe at YEALMPTON next week\, please submit y
 our edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunday evening (9 June)
 \, ideally - TVM! 📝\n\nAdd your photos of the evening's carryings-on at
  Yealmpton (Weds 5 June\, 2024) to the Hash 1470 photo album\, when it has
  been conjured into being.\n_________________\nHASH DIARY - Upcoming Event
 s\n\n🌟FALLEN WOMAN'S MEMORIAL HASH\, 1st June 2024🌟\n\n❗➡ LATE C
 HANGE TO HASH MENU ⬅ ❗\n\nFor anyone who hasn't yet seen the messages 
 on the Facebook group chat\, there has been a late change to the menu bein
 g offered at The Yacht Club after Saturday's Memorial Hash. Unfortunately\
 , only the following reduced menu will now be available:\n\n* Chips - £3.
 00\n*Cheesy Chips - £3.70\n* Meat/Vegetarian Pasty - £4.50\n\n** Please 
 order and pay on the day directly to the Yacht Club **\n\nThank you for yo
 ur understanding.\n\n🌟 🌟 Please remember your bright colours in Fall
 en Woman's honour 🌟 🌟\n\nAlso\, please be advised that The English R
 iviera Air Show is on in Paignton over this weekend\, so traffic in and ar
 ound the area is likely to be much heavier than usual and parking could be
  a bit more challenging\, so please try and allow plenty of travel (and pa
 rking) time if you can.\n\n(An extra tip from hasher chat discussions toda
 y has suggested downloading the RingGo app\, or carrying abundant loose ch
 ange for parking machines [that don't take credit/debit card payments].)\n
 \n👣\n\nRubbery and Pony Shafter have also created a photo album on Face
 book - Fallen Woman's Memorial Album - to which hashers are invited to con
 tribute photos representing their brightest and best memories of the fabul
 ous Fallen Woman.\n\n👣\n_________________\n\n&nbsp\;\n\n👣\n_________
 ________\n\nRAMBO SALCOMBE MARATHON 2024\nSaturday 21st September\, 2024\n
 \n👣\n\n🌟 🌟 🌟 Register here: https://bit.ly/RamboSM2024 🌟 
 🌟 🌟\nOR scan the QR code\, below:\n\n👣\n___________________\nSH4 
 MercHASHdise (Sorry - I still can't think of anything more inventive...)\n
 \nShow your love for SH4 and wear your membership proudly with a bespoke S
 H4 car sticker!\n\nAvailable exclusively to SH4 members (and\, to be fair\
 , anyone else who wants one...) for the bargain sum of £0.50 ea.\, you ca
 n afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊\n\nSee Rizzo at the nex
 t meet for yours 👣\n\n_____________________
CATEGORIES:Hash Trails
LOCATION:Fortescue Arms Green Hill\, East Allington\, Devon\, TQ9 7RA\, Dev
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