On Down at the Village Inn Thurlestone
The Words according to…
…owing to a seasonally-induced oversight (we are clearly lost without our esteemed GM!), no Scribe was appointed at the Boxing Day hash last Thursday, so I’m afraid you’ll have to tolerate another week of editorial placeholder content – or skip altogether and scroll down for the eagerly-anticipated ‘official’ Pre-Xmas ‘Lube Weekend’ write-up, courtesy: one much-missed Pony Shafter!
🌟 👣 🌟
HASH 1503 – BOXING DAY HASH, THURLESTONE
Hares, Olive and Marty, resplendent in festive finery, corralled a very respectable (in number, at least) bunch of hashers to Circle Up in the free (thank you, Pugsley) carpark at the flats above South Milton beach at 12 noon, sharp. A couple of virgins, Lucia and Violet, were gently shoved forward and introductions made, followed by a thoughtful SH4 Hash Symbols 101, delivered by Olive – I think we all learned something…! The hares advised a Long of approx. 5 miles, a Short of about 4 miles and a Walkers route of approx. 3 miles, with not one but two Ha Ha’s to look forward to, and an optional sea-immersion at the end, with everyone repairing to the On Down at The Village Inn, Thurlestone after.
The Longs bounded off towards Leas Foot beach, only to discover the first HaHa, which prompted a swift retreat to the carpark and then back along the cliff for a brief moment before descending onto the beach. A gambol across the sand and reluctant crossing of the fetid creek only led to a further HaHa, discovered in the dunes, however – but, a band of silver-linings types (…), hashers turned this to their advantage and used it as an opportunity to institute an informal Regroup, which became something of a theme for the day, a group-photo moment, and a welcome breather for the still-fuzzy-headed.
Back across the sand we went (later learning that we should, in fact, have followed the footbridge [to avoid another foot-dunking in the micro-organism-laden estuarine soup]) and on on, into the nature reserve. This provided the hares with another prime hasher-dunking facility amongst the reeds – and Marty was strategically positioned to capture every inelegant crossing (some more undignified, and squeal-y, than others…). Blown Off – toting his hand-held fancy camera-on-a-stick – also seized the chance to capture some footage (sure to be deployed to comic effect at a later date).
Up onto the South Milton beach road, past a barn of rather cute calves, and then back into the fields, via a stealthy stile in the hedge, and downhill…before another uphill and out onto the road into South Milton village. That’s Crap interpreted the ‘TC’ that greeted us as we stepped across the stile threshold from field to tarmac as a personalised instruction to Take Control, and decreed another Regroup. It was then uphill to Olive’s gaff, where a Christmas hat, er, be-hatted Blue Nun was manning a most excellent festive Beer Stop, boasting the holy grail of all festive Beer Stop combos: shots of Baileys AND Christmas cake, the latter lovingly prepared by the hare herself. There was also a cornucopia of other festive treats to enjoy, which stalled some hashers for a little longer than others, before we retraced our steps back to the carpark.
Returning hashers were ‘rewarded’ with a Finish Line photo, courtesy of our ever-conscientious Hash Flash, Rubbery, and a handful of intrepid souls continued on to the beach for a bracing sea dip to complete the Boxing Day Hash package.
Back at The Village Inn, many a convivial drink was enjoyed (eventually…the bar did seem a little overwhelmed by the thirsty hashing horde!) before Olive valiantly stepped up – after a day’s hare-ing – to square off the Boxing Day hash with a little speech. Everyone was thanked for turning out, and a few little snippets of notable goings-on were shared – including Rizzo’s narrowly-avoided swan-dive into the deep, chilly waters of the nature reserve (which earned her a very snazzy reflective baseball cap – presumably, so that all such future stumbles will be visible, even in the post-7pm darkness). Lactaster had brought her lovely family – children, husband and parents – whom had all completed the hash, of one distance or another, and despite becoming a little lost… The children had done brilliantly, and were awarded hashing prizes in recognition of their efforts.
I don’t remember there being any Down Downs, but happy to be corrected…
And no parking fines (yet) received 🙌 (thanks again, Pugsley! I think memories of Challaborough are still fresh…)
On on to CALIFORNIA CROSS….er, earlier today!
Shaggy xx
Photo credit: Rubbery
Photo credit: Dimwit
👣
🏃 📸 🍻 You can enjoy a clutch of Christmassy photos from the Thurlestone Boxing Day Hash on 26th December 2024 by checking out Hash Flash’s purpose-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook page 📸 🏃🍻
👣
HASH 1498 & 1499 – PRE-XMAS LUBE WEEKEND (SAT HASH & H.O.D.), BRIXHAM
THE (“Better late than never”) WORDS according to PONY
‘Twas the month before Christmas and time for the traditional festive fun and frolics at the Pre-Xmas Lube weekend, which always delivers – and keeps giving… A welcome return to Brixham, and Grenville House.
On the First day of (the) Christmas weekender my true love said to me… “What’s the weather like in Brixham?” was the stream of messages via social media. Admittedly, when I got there it was quite bright, but the photo that I had posted on the group had given way to greyness and moistness…
Filth, our hostess with the most-ess (who had valiantly organised the weekend), and I, arrive early to get a head-start on transforming the place to ‘step into Christmas’, but the staff had already stepped up and it was very much like Santa’s grotto already (Ed. Five star service from Grenville House!)
The intrepid attendees started to arrive, including a strong contingent of PH3 Party Animals, Pre-Xmas Virgins and the Lovely Little Chef and BOR. As did some more messages from those that were now not attending – Gaffer, aka Donald, aka He-man, had the sniffles and Dead Man Walking, who must have pulled a guitar string. Filth’s fantastic home-made soup was heated and heartily consumed with chunks of crusty bread. We did have a problem cutting the bread as the Centre had sensibly locked away all sharp knives and implements in a padlocked drawer (Ed. but I am sure this was no problem for an ever-resourceful band of ravenous [and ravening…] hashers; who needs a blade in the face of such brute determination?!].
Circle Up was held inside, and numbers were swelled by the addition of other day-trippers: Man Pig (well, part-day), Fluffy Dice, Silly Shunt and Flage, who was racing on the Sunday at Newnham. Yours truly, for being absent for a while, was lucky enough to be press-ganged to do the Words (Ed. ‘privileged’, did you mean there, Pony?).
Fluffy Dice sort of volunteered (Ed. the only way anyone ever volunteers for such an ‘honour’) to carry the Hash Horn.
With due diligence to ‘Elf and Safety (Ed. glad to ‘ear it), Filth gave a detailed itinerary of what was to come, including the most important point, i.e. the name of the pub in Brixham we were finishing at. She and a non-hashing friend had marked the Shorts/Walkers the day before, and Lord Overshot was out laying the Longs, although, worryingly, messaged to say he had been delayed on the ferry… (Ed. suspect this to be a deliberately-engineered tactic to add an extra dimension of challenge to the trail-laying effort: FRB status doesn’t come cheap…😘)
Off we jolly well went along the road towards the Berry Head Hotel… First beer stop? Probably not – too posh. I was joined on the walk by Short on Pork. We met up with the rest of the gang at the first beer stop, Rubbery’s amply-stocked van, ably manned by both Rubbery and Broken Man. BM was less communicable (Ed. and/or communicative?) on Sunday after an incident with his hearing aid in the shower! I SAID, BM WAS… (Nevermind)
There was some concern at the rusty beer cans which had been in Rubbery’s garage for a few years but which actually tasted ok. Snacks and sweets were proffered in abundance, too.
Filth, after locking up, was in such haste to catch up with Santa and his elves that she fell over a sleeping policeman in the GH car park. Must be a related joke there… Luckily, Rubbery was also there and, after he had stopped laughing and taking a photo, helped her up (Ed. what a gent…)
The trail wended its way around the coastal path, and the Longs and Shorts disappeared into the greyness. Tyred Bunny was meant to be looking after the Shorts but was too busy texting a local woman “acquaintance”, it seems.(Post script: it worked, as she turned up at the pub later – you ain’t lost it, TB).
The Walkers, numbers swelled by a few sensible SCBs, headed back down towards Brixham and the Blue Anchor. Filth, Tradesman’s Entrance and Collars ‘n’ Cuffs headed off for a quick visit to the charity shops and came back with some fetching hats ‘n’ stuff. What’s the name of that kids’ film, Cat in Hat…? No, I said CAT! Filth, always goes one step further and had two hats!
The rest of the elves started arriving in dribs ‘n’ drabs. Windy Puff had not only short-cut to get to the pub quicker, also rewarded himself with a large bowl of chips! (Ed. exemplary hashing behaviour)
As our numbers grew, we were shepherded (apt for the time of year [Ed. nice topical touch]) to a side area, as we were blocking the entrance, and then – as was to be expected – some serious amounts of alcohol were consumed before the short stagger back to the Grotto.
On return Hekkel’s superb Christmas cake was soon devoured. Best Xmas frocks and Xmas attire were donned, and an outstanding Xmas meal was prepared and served by the staff – well, one lovely and hard working girl. Crackers, hats, laughter and wine ensued.
Tyred Bunny (ask him how he got his name…lucky boy) the RA for the day had decided there would be a ‘rolling RA’, with the role being passed on, like pass the parcel, and each successive RA giving a few lines before nominating the next. Initial guffaws faded as it, surprisingly, worked! Various enhanced stories were told, and a
number of Down Downs consumed by the recipients, including a new drink of choice – a custard-and-red-wine cocktail… Wonder whose idea that was!
There seems to have been a few issues with the wall on the coastal path; Gaffer’s No Rules; Overshot burping; following Whisperer; map cheaters; missing L/S Splits; big hills; Shorty; extra miles…and Johnny Depp (Ed. a little light on details, this list, Pony – but, really, I think the only item for which further information is completely essential is the last…!)
For a more pictorial/moving-pictures (Ed. -based report of the evening’s Christmassy capers), see Rubbery’s videos on Facebook. Whisperer and the custard is particularly worth it (Ed. the mind boggles – or, more probably, curdles!), and you Hasherettes….maybe? Overshot and Over-Exposed were in charge of the evening’s musical entertainment and impressive light show.
Filth was the instigator of various and novel party games, including Nose Ball
Pushing, Cornflake-packet-munching and the Condom Challenge (that one may have been down to me lol [Ed. we would never have guessed, Pony…] ). What happens at Hash stays on Hash.
Santa arrived and gleefully sat a procession of Hasherettes on his knee to fumble in his sack. The boys more circumspectly drew up a chair and sat next to him (Ed. very sensible).
The music, dancing and drinking went on till the wee small hours – well, 3-ish, as is tradition of course, but no karaoke (luckily?). (Ed. undoubtedly an oversight…)
I must have forgotten to set my alarm up in the Penthouse (not the magazine boys) -nothing to do with the alcohol – and missed waving off the mercifully short HOD hash, which the intrepid Jelly Baby (not ‘Bean’, Nice Tackle) had laid.
Filth and Rubbery, who should be on Masterchef (it’s ok – no Greg jokes are coming) served up a superb, traditional Xmas fry-up, including deep-fried eggs (Ed. pushing the culinary envelope… 😮), which was well-received and heartily devoured – but not before Whisperer’s lack of presence was noted, with shouts up the stairs…until somebody remembered he was sharing Fob Jockey’s van, parked up the road. A panic-stricken FJ was seen sprinting up the road after someone said ‘Stella and Custard probably don’t mix’!! (Ed. oh, crumbs. Or curds…🤢)
The merry band of elves banded together and, like Mary Poppins, returned the venue to its original condition and removed all signs of the previous night’s carnage.
New friendships made and hash bonds strengthened… Hash Family fond farewells were exchanged as Hashers headed off home in their sleighs. All Night Pepys was on her two-wheeled sleigh: good job breathalysing cyclists is rare!
A massive thank you to Filth for organising it all: although numbers were unfortunately down, irrespective of attendance, it takes the same amount of effort to organise. The hard work was worth it, though, as it was a great success, even drawing praise from our answer to Grumpy from the seven dwarves – no names Rubbery, lol.
On On to the Post-Christmas in Torquay – Ho Ho Ho! Be there or be square!
Pony Shafter, aka Head Elf (aka Naughty Elf)
Photo credit: Pony Shafter
________________________________________
👣
Owing to a dose of festive ‘flu delaying the editorial process (and nothing at all to do with fizzy wine – honest!), details of the New Year’s Day hash are still languishing here below – left in place as a clue to where you could have been earlier today (if you weren’t, in fact, already there: and if you were, well done, you!):
🌟 HASH 1504 – NEW YEAR’S DAY HASH, 1st January, 2025 🌟
CIRCLE UP 11.50am for 12 noon start:
California Cross Inn
California Cross
Ivybridge
PL21 0SG
What3Words: afternoon.exists.pockets
Hares: Doggy Style
RA: TBC
For further info, please see the Hash 1504 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.
Add your photos of how the day went down (Weds 1st January, 2025) to the Hash 1504 photo album on SH4’s Facebook page , courtesy: Rubbery.
Next SH4 Hash 🐷👣:
HASH 1505 – DARTMOUTH
CIRCLE UP 7.25pm
Royal Castle Hotel
11 The Quay
Dartmouth
TQ6 9P6
https://what3words.com/rewrites.tinny.ramp
Hares: Can’t Come & Ching Chong
RA: TBC
For further info, please see the Hash 1505 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.
📝 If you were appointed the lucky Scribe at California Cross for today’s New Year’s Day hash, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunday evening (5th January, 2025), ideally – and I promise to do a better job of getting them posted before the next hash than I have managed this week! 📝
👣
________________________________________
HASH DIARY – Upcoming Events
🎄
POST-CHRISTMAS Hash Bash Weekend – 14th-16th February 2025
If you have booked your spot for this snazzy SH4 getaway but haven’t yet paid up, please send your £££ asap to the SH4 bank account, quoting your hash name and ping a quick message to Hash Cash to confirm.
If you’re not sure how much you owe, please speak to Filth/Blown Off (Hash Cash).
🌟 Balances are due by 31st Dec (2024…) as the venue requires payment. 🌟
Payment to SH4 Bank Account:
Acc. no.: 00263482 Sort code: 30-94-72
👣
___________________
________________________________________
SH4 ‘EALTH & SAFETY
Please make a note of the new SH4 hash phone number and add it to your phone:
🌟 SH4 hash phone number: 07922 103701 🌟
Use this number to call for assistance if you come ‘unstuck’ out on the trail, or need to get a message to ‘base camp’ (On Down) during the run .
👣
🌟 Don’t forget to see Rusty Bottom or Ching Chong before the hash to log you out on trail using the new-fangled checking-out/checking-in app (developed by our very own digital-wizard, Whisperer).
Don’t forget to also check back in with the ‘On Secs you’re safely back. 🌟
👣
________________________________________
SH4 MercHASHdise
Show your love for SH4 and wear your membership proudly with a bespoke SH4 car sticker!
Available exclusively to SH4 members (and, to be fair, anyone else who wants one…) for the bargain sum of £0.50 ea., you can afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊
See a member of the committee at the next meet for yours.
👣