Hash 1595 – CHILLINGTON

Hares:  RUSTY BOTTOM and SHAGGY     

W3W: Eclipse.Hot.Pint

Leaving home early in order to view the eclipse, along with other miscreants, I ruminated upon the number of letters in the alphabet – 26, when I last counted. How is it, then, that the letter ‘G’ appears at least twice as many times as any other when it comes to designating scribes? Just asking. [Ed. I think you’re just lucky like that, Gomez…]

If I were to adhere to the benchmark set by last week’s words regarding brevity, I would be signing off now with a cheerful ‘On-On’. However, duty calls and I shall attempt to invent a pack of lies for you regarding this particular hash. One thing I can promise is that there  is definitely no AI involved in this. (Don’t tell anyone, but I wouldn’t know how to use it! )

The circle up was in the middle of a field in the middle of nowhere. In the middle of this nowhere I saw RUBBERY, LAZY GIT, SQUASHED BALLS and JULIA aimlessly milling around whilst NICE TACKLE was proudly showing off his box of cornflakes. Turns out that this was just one of a variety of homemade pinhole cameras and other odd objects brought along to view the solar eclipse. Top among these were  OVERSHOT’s glasses (suit him – he should wear them permanently) and WGAS’s welder’s glass. This was passed amongst the throng freely, whilst OVERSHOT [Ed. aka SH4’s own Del Boy], was charging £1 a look – payment due by the next major eclipse (63 years to wait ,OVERSHOT! ). There were many ooh’s and aah’s during the event, and some hashers were even watching the eclipse! [Ed. Ba-bum-tishhhh!] Show over, SQUASHED BALLS called us to order. DIRTY BUM BUM’s family were introduced to us although they seemed a little reticent and embarrassed about the connection. RUSTY BOTTOM and SHAGGY told us, basically, that the trail was sporadically laid in places with flour, but the marks could be anywhere, if at all [Ed. you lucky things!].

That said, we were off. 200yards later we arrived at the road and I noticed that the hares had belatedly marked the entrance to the field. It would have been of great use had it been there before we had actually all arrived and found our own way in! [Ed. but where would be the fun in that? Folks turning up on time?? No, no, no…] I ran along with GAFFER for a while. Seems that I am not the only oldie whose joints need time to get working. He was creaking more than me!  GOODHEAD and DE-BRIEFED gave me a flea in my ear for guessing the right way. “We want to find our own way” they bleated. Right! No search parties until at least 10.30pm then.

Through the savannah that used to be green fields, we ran. The sheep looked out of place – should have been wildebeast. On to the coast path and it was up,up,up then down,down,down to Torcross. I found myself with KEEPS TRIPPING. We came to what we mistakenly thought was a direction for both Short and Longs. (Turns out it said ‘SWIM’ but in Swahili. [Ed. Which, by miraculous serendipity, seems to be spelled identically to the English ‘SWIM’…]) Following that, of course we got lost and ended up where the road is no more. We were not the only ones though – YEUCK: take note. South West Water are to be prosecuted again for yet another sewage spill into the sea as OUI OUI, POOH POOH  and DIRTY BUM BUM took a dip [Ed. Ha! Very good topical quipping, Gomez]. Finding our way to the road home we found RUBBERY returning from his walk to the pub. PUGSLEY overtook us. As he should, he is a generation younger than me.  We left in dribs and drabs to meet up in the Bear and Blacksmith where there were lots of tourists and lots of hashers. Busy, but with decent food and drink the atmosphere was good. NICE BUNS was RA and regaled the following:

RUBBERY was doing an excellent trade in ‘1600’ T shirts marking both that milestone and the eclipse. Sales slowed when that the eclipse was found to be modelled on his hairy bottom! Look at the ‘T’ shirt if you don’t believe me. [Ed. but never directly at it… You need REALLY special glasses for that 👀]

LAZY GIT had a long hash – from the pub car park, through the garden and into the pub. You just can’t match a lifetime of experience.

NICE TACKLE was injured and was trying to show NICE BUNS his x-ray. She recoiled, thinking it to be yet another, D..k Pic.

WHISPERER was upset that no one had kicked out any checks except for the one that he followed – only to find that it had been kicked out in the wrong direction!

Down downs were awarded as follows:

• Rusty Bottom and Shaggy – hares
• Overshot – eclipse enterprising
• Nice Tackle – superlative eclipse-viewing apparatus 
• Lactaster – ruthless hash-mum-coach tactics

On on to EAST ALLINGTON

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Photo credit: Rusy Bottom

🏃 📸 🍻 You can see more photos from the almost-totally-eclipsed-by-the-view hash by checking out the Hash 1595 photo album 🏃 📸

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Next SH4 Hash 🐷👣 
HASH 1596 – 19th August, 2026 
EAST ALLINGTON

CIRCLE UP: 7.25pm

Outside the Fortescue Arms, East Allington, Totnes, TQ9 7RA
Https://what3words.com/waltzes.snapping.shipyards

ON DOWN:
Inside the Fortescue Arms, East Allington, Totnes, TQ9 7RA

Hares: Nice Buns, Pimples & Rizzo
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For more info, please see the Hash 1596 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.

Add your photos of how the evening went down (on Weds 19th August, 2026) to the Hash 1596 photo album on SH4’s Facebook page.

📝 If you are the lucky Scribe at EAST ALLINGTON on 19th August, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunday evening (23rd August, 2026) – TVM! 📝

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SH4 ‘EALTH & SAFETY

Please make a note of the SH4 hash phone number and add it to your phone:

🌟 SH4 hash phone number: 07922 103701 🌟

Use this number to call for assistance if you come ‘unstuck’ out on the trail, or need to get a message to ‘base camp’ (On Down) during the run.

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  Don’t forget to see Rusty Bottom before the hash to log you out on trail using the new-fangled checking-out/checking-in app (developed by our very own digital-wizard, Whisperer).

Don’t forget to also check back in with Rusty once you’re safely back. 

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SH4 MercHASHdise 

Show your love for SH4 and wear your membership proudly with a bespoke SH4 car sticker!

Available exclusively to SH4 members (and, to be fair, anyone else who wants one…) for the bargain sum of £0.50 ea., you can afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊

See a member of the committee at the next hash meet to get yours.

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