The Words according to NOKKERS

🌟 Scroll down to the end of this email for details of upcoming SH4 events, incl. the fantastic Pre-Christmas Lube Weekend AND 1500th Hash Celebration and Post-Christmas Hash Bash 🌟
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🌟 Don’t forget to order your amazing 1500 hashes t-shirt – exclusively created for us by SH4’s resident graphic-designer, the talented Overshot – see below for further details! 🌟
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Hash 1488 – ST. ANN’S CHAPEL

Circle up
A good number of hashers turned up on a damp, dark evening at St Ann’s Chapel, including the marathoners from Rambo’s Salcombe Marathon, which was held on Saturday (more later). Some visitors and Virgins were also welcomed.

Wetspot was compared to a pencil by GM Rizzo in the weekly joke (can’t remember the punchline, but many options were viciously shouted out by the assembled group. However, in these politically correct times, it should be remembered that even Wetspot might have feelings). (Ed. generous…😘)

Olive was seen to be doing a striptease in the car park. (Ed. what’s new…? 😆)

Hares, Nutcracker and Know Nuts, gave instructions and distances on what must have been a very wet lay earlier that day.
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Caution!
Just as eager hashers were about to set off, dogs chomping at the bit, Hash Flash Rubbery stepped forward and called for everyone’s attention, demanding to see their faces. Was this a photo opportunity? No, it was to remind hashers to make sure they had a phone, torch, buddy and even a tracker device (dog?) when they set out on the hash. Know Nuts stepped forward to say that there are no rules in hashing, but he was quickly pulled back in line by Nutcracker. (Make your own conclusions who wears the trousers in that relationship!)
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Out on the Hash
Pencil-sharp Wetspot and Dimmers apparently talked their way around the hash, still claiming that they were ‘athletes coming through’ each time they approached a group of hashers (Ed. if you say it enough, one day it might come true, right…?) Wetspot also cruelly told Gary Glitter she was going the wrong way. Gaffer was reported to be doing yoga moves and belly-dancing whilst hashing (Ed. show-off) – maybe some form of hash foreplay for later with Yeuck, who was apparently lost in a field looking for a gate.

Second Coming went commando (👀). He was seen to be hashing with bare feet, and later claimed he’d forgotten his t-shirt and pants. His dog apparently peed all the way around the hash, probably to cover the smell of his owner’s feet.

Can’t Come choked on a moth (Ed. Tsk. Rookie error. Moths are not to be ingested without an accompanying pint – you just need to be patient and wait until the pub. Also, FYI, they won’t help you see in the dark). Lots of flying insects were reported to have tormented unsuspecting hashers.
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Drugs
Some hashers on Rambo’s Salcombe Marathon were reported to have been taking pain-killers in order to finish the course. Undercovers claims he smeared himself in pain-relief gel to complete the Marathon. He obviously overdosed, though, as he later suffered from delusions, claiming a small child was offering him Crystal Meth (Ed. oddly, Undercovers’ review of the Marathon wasn’t requested for next year’s event publicity…). Must have been reliving his days as a London cop. Marty was also known to have been ‘tripping’ around the hash, blaming it on the dog.
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Gary Glitter RA
Balancing precariously on a stool, Gary Glitter gave a round-up of the above events. The pub was thanked, and the weather – for not raining on the hash. Gary Glitter was still recovering from having Kevin the dog’s willy in her face when she bent down to tie her shoelace. No lewd comments here! Oui Oui was mentioned for using the men’s toilet, and Goolie was prevented from causing embarrassment by a diligent Sex Wax who was guarding the door. Whether or not Goolie used the Ladies’ in retaliation is his secret.

Ching Chong was pointed out for wearing a Christmas jumper three months early in keeping with the Come Early (Ed. nice one, Nokkers) trend in their house! Youngster Pick Pocket also completed the Marathon on Saturday at the age of fifteen (👏).

Finally, Know Nuts was awarded a 400 t-shirt. (Ed. Woohoo! Congratulations, KN!)
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Down Downs
Nutcracker – Hare – nominated Lactaster for completing Rambo Marathon.
Know Nuts – Hare
Wetspot – for being a pencil
Can’t Come – for eating moths
Second Coming – for no shoes or clothes
Gaffer – for belly-dancing
Undercovers – for drug over-dosing
Oui Oui – for weeing

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Hash Hounds Quiz
So you know your fellow hashers, but can you pair the pooch with the owner?

Fen ——————-
Toby —————–
Zoe ——————-
Mable —————
Tor ——————-
Kevin __________
Pasco __________

Marty, Doggy Style, Pi, Re-entry, Second Coming, Gomez & Morticia, GHR
(Apologies to any dogs left out.)

– NOKKERS Newshound Extraordinaire
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🏃 📸 🍻 You can enjoy a choice selection of photos from the St. Ann’s Chapel hash on 25 September 2024 by checking out Hash Flash’s purpose-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook page 📸 🏃🍻

Photo Credit: Rubbery
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Next SH4 Hash 🐷👣:

HASH 1489 – Barberton, 2 October 2024

CIRCLE UP:
The Church House Inn
Harberton
Totnes
TQ9 7SF

Tel: 01803 840231
What3Words:ozone.latest.bibs

ON DOWN:
As above

Hares: Fob Jockey and Whisperer
RA: TBC

🍟 🧀 🍟 Hash Food 🍟 🧀 🍟

Watch this space…Or, rather, the Facebook Messenger group and Event page for updates.

For further info, please see the Hash 1489 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.

📝 If you’re the lucky Scribe at HARBERTON on 2 October, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunday evening (6 October), ideally – TVM! 📝

Add your photos of how the evening went down (Weds 2nd Oct, 2024) to the Hash 1489 photo album on SH4’s Facebook page , courtesy: Rubbery.
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👣 – PARISH NOTICES – 👣

SH4 1500 T-shirts

For anyone who’s not yet been introduced to these exciting SH4-milestone T-shirts, please see Front (L) and Back (R) designs below.

Prices will be around the £17 mark (TBC), depending on the number of orders secured, and are available with or without the go-faster red flash on the sleeve (deluxe version!) in the usual sizes…

See Overshot or the GM for further details and to order yours!

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🌟Our very own Rusty Bottom is running the Royal Parks Half Marathon in Central London on Sunday 13 October, and is raising money in support of the miscarriage, stillbirth and premature baby charity, Tommy’s. 🌟

Please, if you can, show your support for this amazing charity and the important work that it does (as well as willing Rusty’s legs on to the finish line!) by donating whatever you feel able via the following link:

🌟🌟 Jackie’s fundraiser for Tommy’s, the baby charity 🌟🌟

Or, if you’re smart-phone-enabled, simply scan the QR code below using your
phone’s camera app:

With a big THANK YOU from Rusty!

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HASH DIARY – Upcoming Events

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DATES FOR YOUR HASH DIARY:

PRE-CHRISTMAS Hash Social Weekend AND 1500th Hash – 30th Nov – 1st Dec 2024

🌟 BOOK YOUR PLACE NOW FOR THE BEST-VALUE WEEKEND
OF HASHING AND FESTIVE FUN IN THE SOUTH HAMS! 🌟

Watch this space for details of an Olympics-inspired Games Agenda – coming soon!

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POST-CHRISTMAS Hash Bash Weekend – 14th-16th February 2025

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SH4 MercHASHdise

Show your love for SH4 and wear your membership proudly with a bespoke SH4 car sticker!

Available exclusively to SH4 members (and, to be fair, anyone else who wants one…) for the bargain sum of £0.50 ea., you can afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊

See Rizzo at the next meet for yours 👣

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