|Hash 1141, The Cove Inn, Hope Cove, Nr. Salcombe.
Myself and Uppity UB, having arrived before the customary rush for car-parking spaces at about twenty-five past seven, found a prestigious parking space just outside a, what has been pointed out by some, most expensive car park. Said moaners missed a veritable plethora of – at least three or four – free spaces in the area outside the pub.
Called to order by Opulent Overshot; welcome to two virgins – one tall, the other appearing moderately fit.
Over to the lone hare, Scintillating Spotty Botty, looking resplendent in her best ‘post-hash’ gear – I’ve done it once; I’m not doing it again! She reported that there would be a walk of three miles, a short of four-and-a-half and a long of five, along with a ‘Beer Stop’. (Except that there was no ‘F’ in beer.)
“Marks could be anywhere,” Scintillating continued. One suspects that the ones done on the roads must may have been laid from a car, due to their length and the way they tailed off…
Anyway, we soon set off – me taking up my usual position, a pace, or so, behind Gorgeous Going Down – around the coast path towards Thurlestone.
Little happened in this first part of the hash, except that the old adage of ‘arrows never lie’ appeared not to be a general truth as, following said arrow, we set off uphill towards Malborough before being called back by Vivacious Vincaloo who, somehow, had realised that this was not an arrow to be believed.
Forget to mention that, by this time, Gorgeous had left me behind, Opulent was far ahead, Uppity was lagging behind and Willing Whisperer, apparently, didn’t turn back ‘til he actually reached Malborough!
This meant that, as I had turned back before her, I felt duty-bound to wait for Gorgeous at the Long/Short split as I wouldn’t hear the last of it if I didn’t!
After crossing over the, extremely, smelly bridge – “It doesn’t half pong!” reported Ravishing Rusty Bottom – we arrived at another arrow and the first of many long bits on the road.Here, I lost a little motivation, which allowed Gorgeous, with her usual grit and determination, to forge ahead. Amazingly, even Uppity managed to overtake me as I found myself chatting with Vivacious, Ravishing and Tall Guy. Then Willing shuffled past whispering unhappily about arrows not supposed to lie!
A little later, TG and I stopped to take a wistful look, back over our shoulders, as the sun lowered itself towards Burgh Island, promising a lovely sunset to follow.All too soon, we found ourselves traversing the last field, before some more road and the ‘there’s-no-F-in-beer’ stop.
There then occurred dynamic and dangerous, not to mention dedicated and dextrous, drama on the run-in as we were overtaken by three lifeboat men in their respective cars going hell-for-leather, horns blaring and hazard lights flashing, on their way to a distress-call for the lifeboat. It could be seen, later, powering its way through the surf on its way to provide assistance.
Later still, in the pub, we were called to order by esteemed RA Scholarly Squashed balls who proceeded to imbue us with his insights into the evening’s activities – written on an apple! This took me back, slightly, as I was hoping to purloin his notes to make my scribing easier…
Make of these what you can!
Think the next one contains the ‘down-downs’?
All agreed that it was another fantastic evening, so it’s on-on to next week,
Portentous Piddler on the Hoof.