Church House Inn (Harberton)


Church House Inn

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The Words according to Nutcracker

Hash 1440 – HARBERTON

The Words according to, and made up by, NUTCRACKER


Thanks Fob Jockey, you laid a brilliant run,
Helped by your friends, Helen and Luke,
You lied, and said it would be fun!

But it was fun, you cannot deny that!
Dulux and Cow Pat singing ‘the Owl and the Pussycat’!
Who Gives a Shit mistook a cat for an owl,
And our dear young Shaggy decided to play foul!
She turned off her torch and shortcutted her run
But was awarded later for her 100th run!

Talking of animals: the horses were too frisky and the cows too big,
She’s Ready found sheep shit, and came back smelling of shig!
Blown Off got it wrong,
Gym Slip lost the long,
Overshot talked out of his arse,
No Nuts said it was a bit of a farce!

Lowtarse tried to get out of it,
Twisted Sister was having none of it!
Ching Chong and Can’t Come saw the world’s biggest car
And Rizzo won Movember – beating Blown Off by far!

There’s two very old men in the hash,
Willy Waiver and Wet Spot!
They talk to themselves and can’t remember what they forgot
But I forgot too, I was doing the words, so I tried to be clever,
And ended up writing the worst words ever!!!


Ed: Down downs were awarded to (based purely on the photographic evidence…):
• The trio of Virgin Hares: Fob Jockey, Helen and Luke
• ‘Tiffany’, who managed to dodge a naming…again (a number of fairly heinous options were proposed…)
• Dulux – for last week’s Words (??), which featured a staggering 56 instances of golfing slang/terminology
• Shaggy – for 100 hashes

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