|The Dartmoor Union, Holbeton :18th July 2018
Our esteemed GM brought the mad crowd of hashers and dogs to order with a historical lecture on Iron Age forts….(did anyone see one?!) and the hare, Twisted Sister, told a sorry tale of no shiggy and mismatched trail markings (not HER fault apparently…’twas her sister’s?!)
Off we climbed up and up to start, then through to green lanes which had not seen human feet for decades..(seen a lot of badgers tho’!) On the Short, a tortuous trail crawling over holly leaves showed the hares’ cruel streak. Poor Rusty Bottom was last seen rolling down a cliff after her efforts to keep to the trail came unstuck whist other short cutting B..ds were seen climbing the fence clearly off trail (GingGang, LazyGit, to name just two – have they no shame?!)
On the Long..Whisperer took his time in the long grass with The Pink Ladies whilstOvershot acted true to his name as he over shot the trail mark ending up at Flete House (they didn’t invite him in for tea!) Meanwhile Re-entry showed Pied Piper abilities as he arrived at the Beer Stop with an extra black dog in tow. “Does anyone know this dog?!”Pugsley to the rescue, reads the dog tag and shouts “Darkie!” (very PC – gets a downdown for that!) whilst Rubberry gets on the blower to the owner, Piltdown Man takes control and little ‘Darcey’ is re-united with her owner back at the pub (all’s well that end’s well?)
The beer stop will be remembered for its Doggy Delights …pity that some hashers mistook them as chocolate ! (Piddler & Squashed Balls now have an excuse to be barking mad!)
On the second Long, the Willy Check was a curiosity to keep the pack milling around – was this a new way mark pointer? (not my idea says Twisted – t’was the hare with no name…!)
Fallen Woman was overheard saying that she liked a little squirt (?!)
Back at the pub, DimWit smelled fresher than usual…must be his new shower spray?
Down Downs awarded to
Twisted Sister – the valiant hare!
Barbarella – who has done it 200 times in the South Hams…and got over Sepsis in a week!
Lotarse – for pushing her best friend over leading to her getting Sepsis!
Overshot – for surviving 8 hours of Squashed Balls’ jokes in his car!
Pugsley – a PC ‘racist’!
Squashed Balls – for being barking mad (eating dog biscuits!)
OnOn…..to Ivybridge, Gateway to the Moor