Totnes RFC on 31/10/18
Circle Up at 19:30
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Hash InformationOn Down At: At Circle Up
Hare: Squashed Balls
RA: Spotty Botty
Dogs Allowed On Hash?: On Lead At Times
THE MOST SCARIEST HASH EVER!! EVER EVER EVER….
Squashed balls is doing another hash at the scene of his crime last time out!
It’s Fancy Dress too being Halloween so Horror/Rocky Horror on the hash, after the hash or both!
Squashed Balls Redemption Hash
A.K.A Rocky Horror does Totnes
After much conversation on Facebook new driving chat group, I secure a seat on the Funbus. This will be my virgin ride as a B.U.M.A
7 Hashers, 2 dogs and plenty of bad singing later we arrive expectantly at Totnes Rugby Club fully prepared for the impending doom, we were warned.
Shorts no longer than 9 miles,
Longs no longer than 15 miles,
Head torches were fully charged, spare batteries checked, overnight bags packed.
So the highlights of the Redemption Hash appeared to be:
- Overshot stealing Spotty Botty’s thunder by attempting to get the apathetic hashers at the circle up into a rendition of the Timewarp, Step to the left, Jump to the right……………..
- Barberella and JP, Having grown up in Totnes as Siblings (who would have guessed) ,and knowing the area intimately head for the Rugby Club located on top of the swimming pool.
- A few disgruntled “short” hashers miss the long short split and end up on the long, much to their disgust, due to lots of steep hills.
- Hekkyl and Jyde not content with tripping up the majority of the faster hashers with their extendable dog lead, now take turns trying to trip up each other up by throwing the dogs ball between each others legs.
- At the very welcome drinks stop, B the B somehow manages to lock her car keys inside, but rent a son Tight Fit (due to previous training as a master burglar) breaks in through drivers window to retrieve keys and provide refreshment to now salivating hashers.
- Squashed Balls, having had a severe beating in a previous squash match, or by Twin Buffers ?? lays hash regardless of being on crutches ( maybe supplied for dramatic effect only) and takes absolutely no risks with getting anyone lost and replaces all checks with arrows. Thus making it the most Health and Safety conscious hash to date.
- Squashed balls also claims to have no idea what the “Rocky Horror Picture Show” is actually about, which is hard to believe after a lifetime following Torquay United.
- After having a quiet word with Rear-Entry the previous week, and due to his absence, it was agreed to let Overshot win this weeks hash, to keep levels of moaning about bad back/neck/arms/legs to a minimum. Even though he cheated and carried his fancy dress around the hash in a man bag.
- Back in the clubhouse and after generous helpings of roast potatoes and sausages, Spotty Botty awarded the Down Downs to:
- Arfana, for 100 wasted wednesday’s.
- The two virgins.
- Nice Buns, no idea why.
Knockers, well, for her Knockers !
Barbie, for dressing as if he was attending a Labour conference.
Squashed Balls, for pushing through the pain barrier, and blaming all arrows on Twin Buffers (true gentleman)On On to Ringmore and Goolies Firework Extravaganza.
Hash Location NotesWiFi:
Dogs Inside Venue?: Unknown
Venue: Not Applicable
Pay and Display Parking at Totnes Leisure Centre or Rail Station
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