The words according to Rubbery
East Prawle – The Pigs Nose
In my customary fashion of being economical with timescale allocation for given tasks, I was still optimistic that even with forklifting the late arriving timber delivery to the farm at 18:30, then being given the task of feeding the farm dogs at 18:45, and jumping into the shower at 18:50, leaving home in Woodleigh at 19:10 I might, with a good wind, still be able to get to the circle up before the hashers dispersed.
Sure enough I managed to “drive into the circle” at 19:32.
What I did not quite anticipate was that as I scrambled hastily from my “casually parked” car, and heard Grand Mattress Rizzo call for any more notices, that she hastily added “who’s doing the words” as she saw me raising my hand.
I was just intent on doing a good deed by trying to return a hat left in my car from last weeks hash, and was compensated with doing this weeks words, ‘fair cop’ I walked right into it! I was also disappointed that I had missed Rizzo’s customary groanworthy joke, did it live up to my expectations, I may never know?
I clicked off a few circle pictures just to make sure that I kept up my role as HashFlash, and tracked down my fellow collaborators for our “special trail”. By common consensus we summarily dispatched a downdown before relocating to the pub “to beat the rush” to order some food.
Once in the pub we were met with the bar staff warning us that their system was down so they were unable to take payment for our fare. They were still happy to take our orders and serve the beer however, now that’s the kind of pub we like!
I’m pretty sure it was Filth who came in first to the pub along with a few others intent on getting their food orders in before service stopped.
Relying on the RA Goolie’s scribbled cue notes herewith my interpretation of the events – RustyBottom was both Hare and Birthday Girl, so the traditional birthday song with chicken chorus by Lord Overshot” was rendered.
Lord Overshot back in attendance rotation with Re-Entry was cited for failing to kick out the checks and not calling, in an effort to ”win the hash”, cries of “it’s not a race” ensued from the assembly.
Morticia and Gomez’s dog Zoe created a stir by delivering a massive pooh on the trail, and then made a vicious attack on an innocent hedgehog, which Gomez then dispatched to a hole for it’s own protection.
BitOfRough and BlownOff had a falling out, someone pushed someone, and BlownOff took it out on an adjacent tree by kicking it – resulting in a sore foot.
Speaking of sore feet LittleChef still suffering from a rolled ankle from last week’s hash at Wrangaton Golf Club was determined to keep hashing by completing the Walkers.
With NiceBuns still pulling a sicky after Toe Surgery, meant that Rizzo had excess breathing capacity, she recruited Pugsley as running chatting buddy, a worthy stand in for NiceBuns.
Under covers got horribly lost on the moors last week, he only went and did it again on Wednesday. Ran an extra two miles, but kept very quiet about it!!!
Back in the pub normality had been restored to the payment system in time for the arrival of the main bulk of the hashers, so luckily SpottyBotty had used the money given to her by WhoGivesAShit for a portion of Cheesy Chips to feed to her offspring SnotGobbler (he’s going to love that name in years to come) completely forgetting to order WhoGiveAShit’s portion.
Extending SH4’s welcome GM Rizzo saw that Virgin Emma had made it back and tactfully apologized for pairing her up with Olive (we all know how bad a choice that could have been), but luckily Olive had for once made a timely return to the pub, not so tactful though as Olive was within earshot of the “compliment”.
The usual late returners Barbarella and LowtArse were marginally ahead of former local and “I know this area like the back of my hand” KnowKnuts who clearly didn’t, we nearly had to send out the search party for him.
We all thanked the Pub
DownDowns were awarded to:
The Hares Lactaster and RustyBottom
LittleChef
BlownOff
Gomex
and virgin Emma
ONON to Modbury