The words according to WGAS

The Words – a true and accurate account of the evening according to WGAS.

Hash 1406 3 May 2023 Calancombe Estate Modbury or was it look for Balloons. Pops. Winery said Olive and you end up near Schefferville, Quebec.

Thanks to:
Hares Blue Nun and Olive

So the suitably named Blue Nun and Olive arranged a hash at a winery/eatery which got me thinking as one does that other fellow hashers could organise a hash in appropriately named places and locations as well.

Vindaloo – India, GG – Thailand, Dulux – Paignton? but I’m not sure about Shaggy, Wet Spot, Blown Off or Rubbery, answers on a post card.

Circle up was called by Rizzo who had no need to stand on a barrique to be seen or heard at the Calancombe appellation. The regular hasher’s, visitors and virgin’s were greeted notices read and over to the point us in the right direction crew. Must not forget Rizzo’s regular joke some would say while others possible the majority would say you should.

So off we barrelled with all but one that is running on the grass the exception being an ageing road runner AKA Gaffer with no Wile. E Coyote in sight.

We soon split up to walk the walk short the short long the long or any other combination as would soon become apparent this was a hash with a difference.

Half hard but playful and his trusty companion Scruffy chose the long fortunately for the shorts and walkers and unfortunately for the longs as to give him his full name Scruffy 5 Shi+s he lived up to his name. Scruffy had no respect for the new tarmac and left us wishing we suffered from anosmia. The aroma touching on astringent left hashers a little off balance and in need of aeration and wishing Scruffy had a bung in his bunghole.

The longs ran out and ran back HA HA, the last time I saw so many hashers running in the opposite direction was when a small group of us ran the correct route at Chillington and everybody else ran the wrong way.

Dirty Nights enlightened us on how to tell the difference between a native blue bell and a Spanish one the former bends over like a shepherd’s crook and the latter is a snob or was that stuck up?

A few of us were checking a check on the way back and were treated to a “petrol” coming down the road that contained a couple of bemused occupants who has been taking pictures of flour marks.

We headed back the way we came but encountered a diversion due to the biohazard previously deposited developing a mould that was definitely not Botrytis. What could be described as a budget version Blue Lagoon had us wading across a muddy pond with Emmeline AKA Olive directing us into said pond and Richard AKA Blue Nun encouraging us back out again with Paddy AKA Rubbery taking responsibility for helping any dissenters into the lagoon.

Up between the Vitis Vinifera (99% chance I am correct) next and down and up and along the top in the company of Victor Meldrew AKA Gaffer who certainly had a bit of cork taint tonight given the acidity and bitter sensation of his breathing, his grapes had certainly been fermented.

Whisperer was following a dog or was the dog following Whisperer has Whisperer got a dog if not perhaps he should get one?

Regroup at the cellar for the finish and post hash glass of claret or mug of plonk.

This is an exert from when I did my virgin Words last year.

“As tradition has it I believe the RA notes go to the word scribe for the week but ohh no not this time, ReEntry disappeared with the notes faster than he does past un unchecked check although there was an unconfirmed rumour going around that he kicked out one this week.”

So having learnt something I spoke to ReEntry before he left and was kindly furnished with his notes which only illustrated my need to go to the opticians again and get some prescription microscopes, so please forgive any inaccuracies.

The RA or should we say CMS given the establishment in traditional fashion thanked the venue and hares before the customary illustrations of earthy corkscrew behaviour.

Normal moans too much and not enough.

Shorts something about Blue Nun taking a week off work to lay it or was it shorts is all Shaggy had on after staring in the rerun of the lady in the lake or was that Comando?

Shortcutting by Rizzo Gaffer and co

Half Hard and Napalm dog. If I was a vet I would prescribe some Bisto for that canine
.
Rubbery threw Rizzo in the pond.

Pi is a terrible tart.

Cow Pat couldn’t put enough weight behind the door to get it to yield but didn’t wine.

Squash Balls and Lazy Git all I can decipher is intellectual so apologies I must have got that wrong.

Dulux didn’t get the joke? I didn’t either as luck would have it I was still paying for the food and missed the punchline.

Happy birthdays went to some mature vintages Goolie, Broken Man and not a Bit off Ruff who had adopted a birthday balloon.

Raffle raised £177 for charity.

Down downs or should we call them supertasters went to Blue Nun, Olive, Gaffer, Goolie and Half Hard

Goolie was heard to say that his preference is for a full bodied red not a rose that was a little foxy but a good vintage, I do hope he was talking wine and not about Ging Gang!!

I have added in a few wine terms and one in particular reminded me of what it must be like to have tea at Wet Spot’s, Vegetal – a tasting term describing characteristics of fresh cooked vegetables on the nose.

Next week its on on to: