The Words according to BIT OF RUFF

Hash 1471 – BANTHAM:

The hash summed up in a Haiku:

Warm dry night in June,
Hashers gather, hills await
Laughter fills the air.
[Ed. sounds suspiciously like a dream…]

The rest of it:

We circled up outside The Sloop in Bantham village. There was a good turn out, with a virgin or two and a couple of returning hashers competing for the longest gap between hashes at 19 and 20 years (20 turned out to be 18), respectively – sorry, I can’t remember the names…apart from Harvey, as he was written down in the RA notes.

I guess there was a [“]joke[“] from the GM, but I might have switched off for a minute… The Hares then, very quietly, explained the route: we couldn’t hear it at the back, but something to do with the Mediums (who are they?) following the Walkers at the start, and then the Shorts… There may have been some distances given out, but we were all too excited to hear, and headed off up the path and the hill on the Long – ah, what a hill it was, too! [Ed. Filth was overheard muttering something about not realising how close together the contour lines were on the map when she was devising the route with this near-vertical ascent…]

The hash was very pleasant, even with the hills – occasionally there were a few checks to do, too, but we had to get back to the pub to find out the real crimes that had been committed en route.

Spotty Botty was supposed to RA for the night but couldn’t make it – luckily Nice Buns stepped up to do the task, only to find out that she was not the first choice (possibly Overshot)… Or the second choice (possibly Olive), but the third! [Ed. and not a hint of bitterness about it from NB. Well, maybe just the merest whisper… 😁]

We gave a[n extra] big thank you to the pub, as initially they thought we were a table of two for the evening – a table of two who eat a lot of cheesy chips!

Anyway, the things we found out:

Pre-Hash:

* Filth took Dulux’s car back to her house in Hope Cove, only to find that she had left her door key back in Bantham.
* Filth and Dulux were having a well-earned pint after laying the hash. Dulux put her pint down – and then sat on it. [Ed. unusual imbibing technique…]
* Lots of people were following an “old lady driver” down the lane to Bantham, only to find out that it was Shaggy – not in her normal car (more on that later).

On the Hash:

* Pony Shafter was “on it” at the kissing gate – first Twin Buffers and then Squashed Balls [Ed. such brazenly flirtatious behaviour! So unlike Pony…😘]
* Gaffer was doing the twist – anything to get the sheep poo off his shoes.
* New lady was a FRB – sorry can’t remember name…
* Dirty Nights is scared of cows.
* Ching Chong had a spectacular fall and jumped up as if nothing had happened [Ed. nothing to see here!].
* Rizzo ate a fly, but Can’t Come topped it by eating three – don’t think any spiders, birds or cats were eaten after, though [😅].
* There was a film crew out with a drone filming scenery for a new show with A-list stars in the area. GingGang and Doggy Style got in on the action and are waiting for the royalties / fame, darling .

In the Pub:

* When asked if anything interesting had happened recently, Shaggy said that she had been for a swim before [Ed. after. And less a swim, more a controlled fall into water. But who cares?] the hash, failing to mention the death of her normal car by a delivery lorry and that the insurance company had valued it at £20 [Ed. roughly. Probably. Next offer pending…]!
* There were some interesting things in bags – a few beer samples for the Summer Solstice hash, and – in another bag -Twitch the baby dog.
* Dimmers really enjoyed the hash and WetSpot needs a public apology – not sure what for though.
* Harvey hadn’t been hashing with us for 18 years but not sure how frequently he can come as has three kids and can’t get a pass.
* Overshot is now a house-husband and trying to learn how to multi-task: he can now make a tea while doing the washing.

Bits I couldn’t decipher from Nice Buns’ notes:

* Georgie – coastal flood engineer.
* Man with black dog – wife called Kate Polytunnel
* Ugborough sails and fashured wanda baji [Ed. answers on a postcard…]

Down Downs went to:

Filth – Hare
Dulux – Hare
Harvey – Turned out he hadn’t been hashing with us for 18 years not 20
Shaggy – £20 Car story
Overshot – Home alone / house-husband
Wetspot – public apology
Gaffer – Donald Trumpalike [Ed. Gaffer also enjoyed/suffered the dubious honour of a ‘homemade’ Down Down, provenance (and base ingredients…) unknown 😳 It was somewhat shorter than a half-pint, though, so basically cheating…😉]

It is On On to ERMINGTON for Hekkel and Jyde’s Summer BBQ Hash.
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🏃 📸 🍻 You can enjoy highlights from the ambient, ascent-tastic, Bantham hash 1471 on 12 June 2024, and afterwards at The Sloop, by checking out Hash Flash’s purpose-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook Group 📸 🏃🍻

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Next SH4 Hash 🐷👣:

HASH 1472 – ERMINGTON – 19 June, 2024

🥳 HEKKYL & JYDE’S SUMMER BBQ HASH! 🥳

CIRCLE UP:
The Square
Ermington
PL21 9LP
What3Words: ///blush.lonely.barstool

ON DOWN:
Hekkyl & Jyde’s
Barngates House
Chapel Street
Ermington
PL21 9NE
What3Words: ///originals.servers.intervals

Hares: Twisted Sister & Nice Tackle
RA: TBC

BBQ Briefing:
• Salad, bread buns, jacket potatoes and sauces all provided! 🥳
• Please BYO meat/veggie alternative for the BBQ.
• Bar with a keg of beer (‘Thirsty Blonde’ from Teignworthy Brewery, ABV 4.2%); wine & soft drinks. Please bring CASH for the bar.
• Waterproof attire: optional. Rain deterrents: actively encouraged.
For full details, please see the Hash 1472 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.

📝 If you’re the lucky Scribe at ERMINGTON tomorrow, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk by Sunday evening (23 June), ideally – TVM! 📝

Add your photos of how the evening went down (Weds 19 June, 2024) to the Hash 1472 photo album, when it has been conjured into being.

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HASH DIARY – Upcoming Events

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😎👣⛺🍻🌅 JUST 3 DAYS TO GO!!! 🌅🍻⛺👣😎

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RAMBO SALCOMBE MARATHON 2024
Saturday 21st September, 2024

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🌟 🌟 🌟 Register here: https://bit.ly/RamboSM2024 🌟 🌟 🌟
OR scan the QR code, below:

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See Rizzo at the next meet for yours 👣