On down will be from the Station House Hotel Cafe
Chicken Curry and alternative veg options. Jail Ale keg. £5 cash for food please. Shorts and walkers should be there in good time, longs will depend how good your trail following skills are. On On
The Words according to BLOWN OFF
Hash 1468 – SHIPLEY BRIDGE
It was a warm, balmy summer’s evening. The light breeze drifted along, in the background the subtle sound of lambs bleating and calves moo-ing could be heard. The river gently meandered, whilst a lone unicorn took time for a drink. Blown off…Blown off! That’s a funny name for a mono-horned beast…I woke with a jump.
Back in the real world, it was a classic English summer’s eve. Misty, damp and miserable, and that was just the hashers. Mustering some enthusiasm, we circled up in the car park at Shipley Bridge. Even Nice Buns was there, despite the weather. Also, welcome back to Sex Wax. The liquid sunshine continued.
Somehow, I, like the most naive of rookies, ended up somewhat surrounded and offered up as sacrificial lamb for The Words (Ed. or what is sometimes described as one’s turn). Thus, here are my memoirs of the evening’s adventure:
It started with a monlogue from Re-Entry, to which I wasn’t really paying attention, although I do believe there are a number of gerbils without their bedding any longer. The good news was that it was still raining.
And like that, we were off. At least, the Longs and Walkers were. The adventurous Shorts (all three of them) had to wait for hash hero, Rubbery, to get his large twanger out (Ed. careful with that, now…), giving them something to hold on to as they crossed the gnarly-looking river. After crossing, and led by Spunky, they continued up to the tor, got lost, but somehow all returned alive. The rain continued.
It was out onto the moors for the rest of us, and – unlike any other hash ever – up, up, up. Weaving between paths, shiggy and animal tracks, we followed the trail as best we could, the ‘interesting’ laying enabling the tail-enders to keep within view of the front – at least to start with. The rain sustained.
Continuing up and into some proper moorland bog, Gaffer’s sniper was clearly in the area, taking people out left, right and centre – Shaggy, Dimwit, Triple Top and myself all falling victim: there was more going down than Triple Top’s browser history. It pissed down persistently (Ed. beautifully alliterated 👌).
Meanwhile, a breakaway group of somewhere between 10 and 10,000 hashers embarked on the epic tarmac trail up to the Dam. A history lesson, presented by Dulux, was what awaited them at the top. How she got the OHP up there no one knows. The rain was unabating.
Back to the Longs, who by now were somewhere in the region of Dartmoor. Bit of Ruff was having flashbacks to his Cornwood adventure, but he was convinced by WetSpot to follow the trail like the rest of us. After seven hours of continuous climbing, we summited and, in a heartbeat, began to descend. Down into Overshot’s (love) gulley we headed, arriving shortly upon an abandoned building, WetSpot spying his next Grand design on the way. The mizzle perpetuated.
Not long after, and a small river crossing was navigated, the FRBs catching up with She’s Ready and Little Chef, who had been directed by the Hare on a shortcut. Little Chef looked particularly wet after a neck-high dip (Ed. there’s no such thing as a free…er, shortcut[?]). Nice Tackle, not to be outdone by Rubbery’s tackle, offered a hand to a number of harriets across said river. Did I mention the rain?
Just as we thought it was downhill all the way home, another mountain appeared in front of us. She’s Ready could hear heavy breathing as Overshot came from behind [Ed. 👀] . Somewhere, still climbing up onto the moors, the Terrific Trio (Lowt’arse, Olive and Barbarella) were doing their best to annoy the Hare, deliberately going slow. That’ll learn him! They were well prepared with heavy coats and headtorches. It drizzled drastically (Ed. and step away from the Thesaurus, BO…).
After what was an hour and a half (for the front!), we arrived back at the car park, where we were greeted by swarms of midges and biting b*stards. The race was now on to The Station House. The rain…stopped.
Back in the warmth of the Inn, Traffic Jam was awarded her 1000th hash t-shirt, and She’s Ready prepared to make TC a very happy man (Victoria sponge, I believe).
Down Downs were awarded to some people for some of the things, but not all of the people for all of the things. (Ed. masterfully summarised: I can only contribute a bit more detail based on some fairly straightforward deductions and, er, some online photo-album scouring: Re-Entry, for hare-ing; I think Py gracefully nominated Barbie for her co-hare Down Down; Traffic, for 1000 [!] hashes, and a bespoke T-shirt; WGAS, awarded an enamel badge retrieved from Lazy Git’s innards[!] – a tiny, metaphorical torch, as it were, handed [a little gingerly…] from one post-operative hasher to another[!]; Bit of Ruff for going a little off-piste, again [?]; Spunky, for fearlessly leading two visiting/virgin hashers across the river on the [true] intrepid Short trail; and Rubbery, for superlative hash-hero-ing and his impressive tackle).
And, just like that, they left.
Maybe it was just a dream after all…
Thanks Again to the Hares (Re-entry & Py) for persisting in the lovely conditions.
On-On to The Fortescue Arms, EAST ALLINGTON courtesy of Overshot, Sniffer and the landlord’s large local sausages
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🏃 📸 🍻 You can enjoy highlights from the soggy Shipley Bridge hash 1468 on 22nd May 2024, and afterwards at The Station House Cafe, South Brent, by checking out Hash Flash’s purpose-built photo album on the SH4 Facebook Group 📸 🏃🍻
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Next SH4 Hash 🐷👣:
HASH 1469 – EAST ALLINGTON – 29th May, 2024
🍻🏃 🥳 OVERSHOT’S 50th BIRTHDAY HASH! 🥳 🏃🍻
CIRCLE UP:
The Fortescue Arms
Green Lane
East Allington
TQ9 7RA
What3Words: ///wager.spaces.prominent
ON DOWN:
See above.
Hares: Overshot, Sniffer & Chipolata
RA: Re-Entry
For full details, please see the Hash 1469 event page on the SH4 Facebook Group.
📝 If you’re the lucky Scribe at EAST ALLINGTON tomorrow, please submit your edition of The Words to thewords@sh4.org.uk – by Sunday evening (2 June), ideally – TVM! 📝
Add your photos of the evening’s carryings-on at East Allington (Weds 29 May, 2024) to the Hash 1469 photo album, when it has been conjured into being.
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HASH DIARY – Upcoming Events
🌟PLEASE LET GOOLIE KNOW ASAP IF YOU ARE HOPING/INTENDING TO ATTEND THE MEMORIAL HASH FOR FALLEN WOMAN ON 1 JUNE – BRIXHAM YACHT CLUB NEED TO CONFIRM NUMBERS: THANK YOU!🌟
Rubbery and Pony Shafter have also created a photo album on Facebook – Fallen Woman’s Memorial Album – to which hashers are invited to contribute photos representing their brightest and best memories of the fabulous Fallen Woman.
👣
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👣
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RAMBO SALCOMBE MARATHON 2024
Saturday 21st September, 2024
👣
🌟 🌟 🌟 Register here: https://bit.ly/RamboSM2024 🌟 🌟 🌟
OR scan the QR code, below:
👣
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SH4 MercHASHdise (Sorry – I still can’t think of anything more inventive…)
Show your love for SH4 and wear your membership proudly with a bespoke SH4 car sticker!
Available exclusively to SH4 members (and, to be fair, anyone else who wants one…) for the bargain sum of £0.50 ea., you can afford one for every vehicle in your fleet! 😊
See Rizzo at the next meet for yours 👣